Using Humor To Manage Stress And Stay Positive

A good sense of humor is a valuable life asset for anyone at any time. Every chuckle or guffaw brings with it health benefits, and laughter spurs creativity, collaboration, and analytic precision. But at the present, humor is especially valuable as an antidote to the additional stresses and anxiety reported by 50% of the entire United States population because of the coronavirus pandemic.

Undoubtedly, the recognition of this value of humor in frightening times has resulted in the “massive outpouring of gags, memes, funny videos, and general silliness.” But while a chuckle or laugh at someone else’s jokes provides a (welcome) distraction from our fraught circumstances, to actually reduce our stress and maintain a positive attitude, we need to actively use our sense of humor to find the amusing, laughable, and ridiculousness in our situations. For women, this is particularly important because their stress levels are significantly higher than men’s.

Let’s look at the primary reasons the pandemic is causing such unprecedented stress—social isolation, uncertainty and overwork—and then discuss how we can use humor to mitigate that stress.

Causes of Stress from Coronavirus

• Social Isolation: As psychologist David J. Palmiter puts it, “Cars are made for gasoline. We are made for social connections.” And as the Mayo Clinic advises, when we lose our in-person social connections and opportunities for human physical contact, our “stress, anxiety, fear, sadness, and loneliness” increase greatly.
• Uncertainty: Because we don’t know the ultimate effects of the pandemic on our lives, we are at risk of losing our sense of agency, our sense of having the ability to shape our futures.
• Overwork: According to the latest data, employees working from home are logging three more hours per day on the job than they did before the stay-at-home orders; peak email time has crept up an hour to 9:00 a.m.; and VPN providers report spikes in internet usage from midnight to 3:00 a.m.—spikes that were not present before the coronavirus. As a result, burnout is becoming increasingly common.

Consequences

The combined effect of social isolation, uncertainty and overwork is a sharp increase of stress, anxiety, and burnout for everyone. Women in particular, however, have been severely affected.

• One in four women, compared to just one in 10 men, report severe anxiety accompanied by debilitating physical symptoms
• 31% of women with full-time jobs and families, compared to only 12% of comparably situated men, say they have more to do than they can possibly accomplish.
• Nearly 50% more women than men report they feel that worry or stress due to Covid-19 has had a major negative impact on their mental health.
• 33% more women than men report that worry or stress due to Covid-19 has had some negative impact on their mental health.

Common Advice

Public health authorities, social media sites and the press have all offered advice about how to reduce the negative effects of the stress resulting from the pandemic. The CDC, Harvard Medical School, the American Psychological Association, and many other organizations are suggesting people reduce their screen time, take frequent breaks, exercise, get outdoors, connect (virtually) with friends and relatives, limit the intake of news, keep to a schedule, eat and drink sensibly, and practice deep breathing and meditation. Despite the flood of jokes, memes, and humorous videos, however, no one seems to be recommending the active use of humor to deal with stress and anxiety.

How Humor Can Help

The absence of recommendations to intentional-use humor to reduce stress is particularly surprising, given that “humor is the most natural and cost-free method of reducing stress, anxiety and tension while also improving an individual’s physical and mental health as well as enhancing a positive world view.” People with a good sense of humor “respond to stress with less anxiety, less depression, and less general mood disturbance” than those who lack the ability to view difficult situations “through the filter of amusement, laughter, and levity.”

But again, it is not enough to laugh at other people’s jokes, we need to use our sense of humor to find the incongruities in—and the alternative interpretations of—the stressful situations we face so that we can find a more positive and hopeful perspective on these situations. As Rod A. Martin writes in his book, The Psychology of Humor, this ability to shift perspectives enables people with a strong sense of humor to distance themselves from the immediate “distressing nature of the situation and . . . reduce the often-paralyzing feelings of anxiety and helplessness.”

For example, a study found that when female executives had a strong sense of humor and optimism, they interpreted undesirable life events more positively, and they experienced less burnout than female executives with a less strong sense of humor. The researcher concluded that humor and optimism provide “greater potential for cognitive restructuring and a greater potential for redefining or reappraising stressful situations more positively or more humorously.”

Of course, there are many aspects of the pandemic that are decidedly not funny—the horrifying number of deaths, the disproportionate impact on people of color, and widespread economic distress, to name just a few. But even such truly awful events can become less overwhelming and more tenable—if not less appalling and dreadful—when humor is used to achieve a degree of emotional distance. Using humor in this way gives us a sense of power over the frightening situations we are facing. This is precisely why “so many cancer patients say ‘If it hadn’t been for my sense of humor, I would never have survived the treatment let alone the disease!’ They recognize the power of humor to help them cope.”

Apart from the horrific things happening because of the pandemic, many aspects of the circumstances we have been forced into are downright ludicrous—spending 24/7 in the same physical space by ourselves or with the same people, dealing with the flubs and glitches of video conferencing and living with total unpredictability, again to name just a few. When we recognize how bizarre and crazy so many aspects of our current circumstances are, we are better able to endure them with a chuckle or a smile—even if the smile is only wry or ironic.

Even in times as trying as these, a sense of humor allows everyone—but women in particular—to maintain a positive attitude: to laugh at themselves, their circumstances, and the preposterousness of what they are being asked to do and endure.

If you feel as though your sense of humor could use a boost, a variety of techniques are available:

• Identify one or two things every day that are bizarre or outlandish. Imagine them increasing 10-, 20-, 100-fold to the point of total ridiculousness where you find them not just amusing but worthy of a full-throated laugh.
• Tell short, amusing stories to colleagues and friends about your daily frustrations and inconveniences. You are not trying to become a stand-up comic, but you are trying to become someone who can turn the sour into the semi-sweet.
• Read, listen to, or watch humorous, goofy, or silly short videos, tweets, monologues, GIFs, and stories. When you find ones that particularly resonate with you, expand or adjust them so that they more accurately capture the humor in your situation. Share the modified vignettes with your colleagues and friends.
• Remember, what’s funny to you may not be funny to someone else. Examine what makes you smile and laugh—and then look for those sorts of things in your circumstances.

And keep in mind Peggy Noonan’s comment, “Humor is the shock absorber of life; it helps us take the blows.”